Posts Tagged ‘ Leadership ’

How Far is Heaven…

When I was in the ATL this past week on business, I had a lot of time to think while I was driving.  Of course, driving there is either 85mph or 8mph, with very little in between.  But I digress…

I also had a listen to Los Lonely Boys on the radio, and after years heard their song “How Far is Heaven”.  It got me thinking.

One of the things I thought about was how sometimes we make choices in life that make it hard for us to make the right choices later on in life.  Specifically when it comes to career choices.  We decide to go down a particular path, and then we hit a certain point and wonder if we made the right choice way back when. And if the thought goes deeper still, we might even find ourselves longing to really discover what truly motivates us and then figure out a way, perhaps, to make a living at it.

But depending on how much you have invested in, and received return on, that initial choice, it’s not always so easy to be as objective with ourselves about whether we should do anything about this newfound desire for meaning and fulfillment.

I suppose that’s why they sometimes call this a mid-life crisis.

And it truly is hard, because if you’ve been at all successful in your career and have made strides financially and organizationally, thinking about leaving all that behind is scary.  And sometimes unwise.  Especially if you have others that are depending on the lifestyle you’ve created for them.

As I was pondering this, the story from the book of St. Luke about the rich young ruler came to mind.  See, there was this guy who became very enamored by the teachings of Jesus and decided that he wanted to follow his teachings and inherit eternal life.  Ultimately, following Jesus.  Now, I imagine doing so would be a complete shift for him.  After all, he was a ruler, so he had authority and power.  Following Jesus meant giving that up – instead of leading, he would now be following.

But this guy was earnestly seeking to change his pursuit, so Jesus tells him basically that he should obey the commandments that was laid out by God and delivered by Moses.  The ruler then replied that he had actually done all of those things.  Ever since he was a boy.  But Jesus knew that if this ruler was going to truly change his life, his perspective, his pursuit, he’d really have to give everything up.  Everything.  And while he was willing to give up his rulership, there was one more thing Jesus said he needed to do if he was going to transform into this new person.

He had to give up his wealth.  Jesus asked him to sell all that he had and essentially start over.

Well, the story ends with the rich young ruler becoming a very sad, rich young ruler.  Because he did have a lot of wealth.  Luke doesn’t tell us how he got wealthy, but let’s assume he worked hard for it.  And he had a lifestyle he had built around it.  Probably had family dependent on him for it.  So to give all that up – even if it meant pursuing his true calling from his heart – was too much for him to bear.

Now, I’ve heard plenty a sermon on this passage, and typically it’s about how we can’t serve God wholly if we serve other things more – like money, sex, or anything else.  And it’s true.  But what if you don’t believe in God or Jesus?  Can you take anything from this passage.

Well, I think so.

See, even if you don’t believe in the heaven that the Bible talks about, you probably do have some sense of peace and nirvana that you are looking for.  Your “heaven”.  Whether it’s job satisfaction, relationship satisfaction, or financial satisfaction, or something else, there is something that you are likely striving to attain.  But if pursuing your heaven is costly for you, the decision will undoubtedly be harder, and you might even abandon your pursuit altogether.  Why?  Well, the thing about heavens, whether celestial or earthly, is that they are mostly unknown, and require a leap of faith to believe they exist.  As opposed to what you already know – your job, your relationships, your possessions.  Those are all things that are somewhat certain.  Heavens are not.

So maybe you know what your passion is and can see a path to pursue it.  But it might involve a huge income drop.  Or going back to school.  Or moving.  Or giving up authority and status.  Those riches can easily get in the way of you pursuing your place of peace, serenity, and rest.  Maybe you can see a relationship that will completely change your life.  But it might involve you losing your freedom to do whatever you want.  Maybe you’ll have to give up some friends or vices.  And depending on how you calculate it, you could end up just discarding the best thing that could ever happen to you.  Because of your riches.

Don’t be like the rich young ruler who saw what he wanted and needed to do but let his possessions prevent him from doing it.  Instead, be willing to sacrifice it all for that pursuit that is worth it.  Life is way too short to do otherwise.

Luke ends the story with Jesus saying “Indeed, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the Kingdom of God”.

Indeed.

2011
11/19
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Delta…why are you doing this to me?

I can’t believe it’s been over two months since my last blog post.  Lots of changes have been going on in my world.  Home renovations the past few months are finally done.  New school year for my girls, including one now in high school.  And I just recently left my post at Nuance for the past three and a half years and am now part of Upstream Systems, one of the world’s leading mobile marketing firms.

Along with all those changes, however, my time in the air has not simmered; in fact, it’s increased a bit lately.  So much so that I’ve finally achieved that somewhat exclusive moniker of a Diamond Medallion with Delta.  Despite sometimes inconvenient routings, I’ve pretty much stuck with Delta over the past twenty or so years of traveling, and in general have had a pretty positive experience.  In fact, when people have told me of the trials they have endured on the wings of Atlanta’s hometown airline, I scoffed and said I was more than pleased with the service quality, mostly on-time schedules, and despite not getting an upgrade every time, the perks of being a frequent flyer.  Our last trip to Italy was courtesy of the Skymiles I had accrued…all business class.  So, overall I have been a great member and cheerleader of the Medallion family.

But that’s all changed.

The past four or five months, it is the exception that my flights are on time, particularly from the airstrip at Fort Walton Beach to my connecting point in the ATL.  In most instances, I haven’t missed connections, but there have been a few times when I have been forced into an extended stay at Hartsfield-Jackson.

This year I also had my first tick in my dinner tray in first class.  Needless to say, I chose not to keep eating.

In the past two weeks, however, it seems like the chaos has been continuous.  Flights have been delayed consistently.  Gate agents have been less than friendly at times.  And don’t get me started on Delta’s technology systems that are supposed to make flying easier for us frequents but have instead caused more anguish, including missed flights, cancelled reservations, and just downright frustration.

As I’m writing this post, I’m on a flight home from SFO to VPS, with a stopover in the ATL.  Seat 2A.  And the video systems are down.  But not on the whole plane.  Just first class.  In fact just seats A & B in first class.

So in the words of the Pet Shop Boys, I have to ask.

What Have I Done to Deserve This?

Perhaps my expectations have gone up now that I’ve achieved the highest crown in the Delta family.  But I have to think that there has been a general degradation of service.  I know that flights between VPS and ATL have been reduced, and I have to believe that the inflight experience has faced the knife of optimization in the wake of falling profits and higher taxes.

Of course, much like my bank which I am less than thrilled with, I have so much invested now in my relationship with Delta that I have to weight whether the supposed “perks” that go along with status are worth what I have experienced in the past six months.  Given the fact that in my new role I expect my travel schedule to at least stay at the same frequency, I wonder if I should be checking out other options.

Or maybe my bad luck will take a turn in the opposite direction and I’ll once again feel good about putting all of my loyalty in one airline’s bucket.

If there are others that have experienced the same changes in service quality, either with Delta or with another carrier, I’d be thrilled to hear from you.

Peace.

2011
10/21
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The Holstee Manifesto

This was just the inspiration I needed today.  I hope it will inspire you as well.

Also, go visit their site here.  They have some cool stuff.

http:///www.holstee.com

2011
08/08
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What Would You Do?

In between the several contracts I am reviewing today, I took a quick news break and saw this article.  It tells of a family who bought a new home, moved in, and found a huge sum of money in the attic, likely placed there by the deceased former owner over decades.

Instead of this new homeowner – with lots of financial worries of his own – taking the money and ridding himself of some short-term pain, he did the honorable thing and contacted the family of the former owner so they could claim what was left for them.

Legally, the new homeowner owned what he found in his house.  But it wasn’t about the law – it was about what was right.

I’m sure his wife and kids looked at him funny; maybe even called him crazy.  But those are all short-term descriptors.  The qualities that last have more to do with character – honesty, integrity, justice, generosity, forgiveness.  And yep, those things are typically seen by others as crazy, because they certainly don’t have short-term benefits.

And while this guy will still have his short-term financial woes to deal with, his long-term peace, security, and happiness I am sure will only be stronger.

Those kids are lucky to have him as their dad and role model.

2011
05/20
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Start With a Purpose

The utterly unsinkable brian cork recently posted on his blog:

“Do we allow good things to happen, or make great things occur”

There are of course many cliches around this –  lemons out of lemonade, when the going gets tough, the tough get going, etc.  But each of those rely on a less than favorable event occurring that spurs us on to higher velocity.

But what brian (if you read his blog or know much about brian, you’ll understand why I don’t capitalize his name) is suggesting is actually starting out looking for opportunities to achieve great things, versus waiting for your hand to be forced.  This is living life with purpose.

Intentionally.

Then, his latest update quips on our reputation – both inward and outward.  He says,

“your outer life is your reputation with people, but your inner life is your reputation with God”

And here was my comment back to him:

Not only that, but when you are content with having your inner reputation and outer reputation in concert rather than in conflict, your probability of Joy (not short-term emotional highs, but long lasting contentment, peace, and satisfaction) is colossal.

Our purpose and our reputation are tightly wound.  Missteps can be forgiven.  Wounds can heal.  So long as inside of it all a clear purpose comes through.  Without it, however, each misstep can be seen as intentional, thereby crushing our reputation.  And revealing the true motivations of our heart.

2011
05/17
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Why Proper Alignment is Important

I’ve been thinking a lot about alignment these days.  Still being the self-certified car nut that I am, most of my analogies can tend to relate to some type of automotive nuance, and this one is no different.

The purpose of setting the alignment on your car is so that as it goes down the road, it’s steady course is to track in a straight line.  This way, barring any directional inputs from the driver, things go a long at a nice, easy pace, and cause no undue wear on expensive suspension components or tires.

Now most cars will stay in alignment unless there is some trauma – pothole, accident, or Dukes of Hazzard-style canyon jumping.  That’s because they come that way from the factory, and are set to stringent specifications so that the car stays in alignment.

What happens if it’s out of alignment?  Well, the car is still drivable, will still get you to your destination, and depending on the degree of misalignment, may not be noticeable at all, or you might have to literally fight the steering wheel the entire time to keep the car in a straight line.  Regardless of the observed symptoms, however, you can be sure that a car that is out of alignment is working harder than it has to and also is wearing out components that were never meant to handle that kind of stress.

I think life is quite the same way.  I’ve often said that when we can combine our passion, with our ability, and have it fit within our reality, we have the opportunity to experience true satisfaction and happiness in life with little arduous effort.  However, if you get one of those things out of whack, we start to wear out parts of us that aren’t meant to deal with the stress.  Oh yeah, we’ll still get to our destination (or at least a destination), but we will be much worse for the wear.

I know what my passion is – helping people find their way.  I discovered this about myself in 2004 during a period of self-evaluation after a job layoff.  And I’ve also seen that I’ve had the highest degree of personal peace and satisfaction when I’ve been able to exercise my passion, using my skills (ability) to influence others in my current reality.  But I’ll have to admit that much too often, I’m willing to sacrifice one of those three things in an effort to either get somewhere faster, easier, cheaper, without regard for the need to live in alignment.  And I sense that this is a common struggle for man.  How do I take that which I know I am called to do, and work to build up the skills to do it, and create a personal reality that allows me to do it?

It’s not easy.

In fact, there’s few people I know that are able to do that.  We trade houses, cars, positions, stock options, etc. in exchange for doing our passion, thinking “well, I can always try to root myself back into who I am in my job later”.  Or we don’t invest enough in personal growth and skill development (or perhaps resist asking for help along the way) to ensure we can do what we really want to do, given our current circumstances.  Regardless of the method of our madness, the longer we delay, the more wear we take on, the more damage we may cause that is irreversible or at the least very expensive, and before you know it, so much time has past that you’re focused so much just on staying on the road, instead of reaching the destination you desire.

Stan’s death has really caused me to think hard about where my alignment is.  How can I take my current reality, and align it with my passion and abilities?  What would that even look like?  I just turned 40, and this is far from a mid-life crisis (I think), but the last thing I want to do is just keep thinking that there will always be time for a course correction later down the road, and that I just need to focus on staying between the lines now, no matter how hard and painful it may be.

Because who knows how much time we have left.  And life is too short to keep forcing the wheel…

2011
04/18
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Remembering one of the best people I ever knew

Stan Annandale was a friend.  He was also my youth leader back in the 80s.  Our age difference was about 14 years, but you’d never know it.  He treated me just like I was a true buddy.

As he did all the other lives he touched.

I just found out today that Stan had cancer, and that he died last night.  Even though the last time I had a close relationship with him was in 1985, and the last time I spoke with him was in 2003, I have to honestly say that no one has touched my life as deeply as that one man had.

He taught me how to truly love others.  He taught me about the love of Christ, and pushed me to learn the scriptures, but never in a typical “shove it down your throat” manner.  You wanted to learn more and live better because of him, not because of what he said.

I still remember that he was the first one to ever let me drive a car.  It was his 1976 Ford Pinto, and I was probably 12.  I drove it around the church parking lot, and he complimented me on my skill.  I also remember going out with him during “20/20 Vision”, our Monday night church visitation program, and he and I would ride to different families that visited church that past week to just stop in and say hi.  I was always just so amazed at how much fun we had, and how unassuming “church visitation” could be.  It was all about just showing people that you cared.

He was also the one who taught me how to play the guitar.  Not Jimi Hendrix, mind you, but chords so I could play all the wonderful songs we sang on Wednesday nights at youth group.  To this day, I still play a G chord in the wrong way because that’s the way Stan taught me.

I remember our black, 3-ring binder devotional books that we had in middle school.  This was for us to take notes during service, and to also use during our daily quiet times.  Such a simple little tool, but it was all intended to build discipline in us.

Then the wedding…here he is marrying the girl of his dreams, and I remember the “fake car chase” where Ronnie Pettit jumped in Stan’s Pinto while Lynn was in the front seat and took off with her.  And how Stan and Jeff Garrett (I think) jumped in his pickup truck to go after them.  And how in the midst of all of this, a helicopter landed and they all arrived back at the church parking lot and the two of them left to start their life together.

I can’t tell you how much I miss that man.

I can’t tell you how much I’ve missed his influence.  The influence he had on a young teenager trying to figure out life.  And how he chose to invest – really invest – in so many people.  And his only agenda was to show people that he cared.

Stan, I wish I could tell you how much you have meant to me, and how I think of you often.  Those 5 years I had with you decades ago truly shaped my life.  I wish I could only be the same type of friend to those around me as you were to me and all those other youths at Piedmont Baptist Church in the 80s.

I’ll miss you, dear friend.

2011
04/15
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The price of playing unfairly is never learning how to win fairly

The price of playing unfairly is never learning how to win fairly
Umair Hague, “The New Capitalist Manifesto”

2011
02/21
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Church Attendance and Prayer

I had the opportunity to comment on a blog referred to by my good friend and colleague Brian Cork. This particular post asked the question why people attend church and why do they pray. The posit was that it was an indicator of weakness, not strength, that people would engage in such activities. I disagree.

Below is the response I provided. What do you think?


I won’t purport by any means to be an expert on the subject, but one that has years of experience on it. So I’ll take a quick moment to share why I pray first, and then why I attend church.

I acknowledge the existence of a higher power, and have chosen to live my life based on a specific theology around that higher power. Part of that involves communion between that power and myself. Now, that higher power, if it truly exists as I believe, is worthy of my time and my praise and thankfulness. And I do that through prayer.

I do ask for guidance and wisdom, since I believe I can acquire knowledge on my own, but that wisdom requires divine intervention. But I’ve learned over the years that seeing the one I serve as a “fairy godfather” both a)diminishes their true value and worth, and b)leaves me disappointed and ultimately weak if my only dependency is to receive a blessing out of my typically self-inflicted circumstances.

So…why do I go to church? It is an opportunity for me to learn more about what I believe, and have it be challenged and strengthened. I don’t go into it blindly; I don’t accept everything I hear. But I do get to hear from others’ perspective how they are working along their road of reconciling their heart and their mind. I also benefit greatly from the gathering of those that share similar interests and convictions in that context. Much like what I receive by attending sales meetings for my firm, or sessions around business strategy.

Am I the wealthiest man on earth? Depends on your measure of wealth. I have a great family, live in a wonderful city, have lots of friends, and a satisfying career.

Does my allegiance to this higher power mean that I am spiritually insecure? If insecurity means that there is something beyond me that I cannot control, then yes I am.

Am I secure in what I believe? Well, that’s part of the journey now, isn’t it…

And one day, I hope to be.

2009
11/10
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